Friday, May 16, 2014

How To "Keep It Real"

I've spent considerable time thinking about and studying personal authenticity, or one's proclivity to "keep it real," aka known as being honest with one's self and others.

Psychology does not provide a great deal of research on authenticity; it is more concerned with identity - which is the distinct personality of an individual, versus one's authenticity - the quality of being authentic, aka being true to one's self.

Those who have learned how to be honest with themselves (publicly, privately, in their actions, interactions, and choices) have the least amount of difficulty in "keeping it real." They keep it real most consistently, not necessarily naturally; they do it consciously, deliberately, and ultimately, effortlessly.

Why is it so hard for people to keep it real?

Because of fear. Fear of being rejected or viewed in a less than favorable light. The inability to keep it real runs parallel to one's willingness to keep it fake.

The person who is less inclined to keep it real is twice the liar because they lie first to themselves, then to others. Why do they lie? Because they feel their chances of getting what they want through lies is greater than their chances of getting what they want by keeping it real.

When you find yourself not being real (you have to be real first before you can keep it real) assess your desire to be liked, accepted, or viewed positively. Chances are it's  the root cause of your inauthenticity. Once you become aware of this, find the courage to align your words, actions, and decisions with what you really think, feel, and believe. Practice daily to keep it real.

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